Saturday, October 24, 2009

10 Years, Where did they Go?

It has finally dawned on me that I have been home for 10 years. Where did the time go? I have been saying all along that blink, I was 24 and blink, I am 34. There have only been a handful of things that I have done for any duration of time. One of being school and another is having a career. I call it that because I have been a life longer learner. In some instances, I wonder if I enjoy the stresses of having to catch up because I am behind on my assignments. Always working on a time schedule and trying to catch up or even get ahead if possible. What will I do without the stresses once I am out of school? Replace that stress with another?

I work daily and make a decent living, but is it all truly worth it? The children have changed and yet they stay the same. Don't get me wrong, I am thankful I have a job, but to get up and go to a place and be confined for eight hours of the day. Man, to some extent that is too much! People bring stress to you for no reason. Do I want to continue to live this way. My job doesn't define who I am. Ten years gone, will another ten go by and wow, I am 44? What will I have accomplished then? Been thinking about my future and what I want to be when I grow up.

There are a few things that must be done soon:
Escalade paid off
Wachovia paid off
MEA paid off

Thinking big things for the future, what is the worst thing that could happen? I want to teach online courses instead of going to a traditional school. That will free me up to do other things that I am interested in. Realized that things I once was interested in, they no longer are important to me. My health, future, and longevity are a few of my main concerns. I am not this typical person and I understand that. It will be like just graduating from college and coming home and looking for a job. Starting over fresh. Save some money and use that cash to purchase a home. Fix it up and rent it out. Wait some time and it should be worth more than I spent on it. Make the money back and a little more.

I just don't want time to keep passing by and I have stood still for twenty years. That can't happen to me, I will not do that to myself. Change is here and I am going to use it to my advantage.