New Year, Same Old Thing

Happy Happy New Year!  There are so many good and not so good things going on.  Let's see my credit score has dropped something serious.  I have paid off Marybelle, that's $450 to debt.  Things are working themselves out.  2015 was a different year for me.  Having to adjust to being a new mom says it all.  I never thought this would be my reality, but it is.

Looking back over all the years.  The fun, sex, relationships, useless things that have gone and really didn't mean anything.  What was the purpose?  Back then, I should have been an international traveler.  Instead of trying to have all the sex, or make this relationship work.  I should have been purchasing real estate and filling up my passport.  Which by the way, I haven't gotten the first stamp in it.  Go figure.

Being 40 has made me realize many things about myself.

• loner
• kind
• giver
• caring
• emotional
• lovely
• adventurer

Just to name of few.  Right now, of course, I am where I thought I wouldn't be.  Living in one of my rental properties understanding that it is time to move on to something else.  

What have I been doing to make things better?

• pay off student loans prior to 1995 so I can get teacher loan forgiveness
• 1638 and 3600
• contact private loans that are with collection agency to see about updating credit information
• working on getting house ready for when I move
• paying off credit cards 
• pay off medical bills
• save something monthly

Last year was really different.  Getting adjusted and making sure that I had enough.  Losing myself and now trying to get her back has been a journey.  Also, yesterday, my new furnace got put in, that was $1400.  Not thinking that I deserve better has been an issue, but overall I been staying above water.  

This credit score has dropped below 600 and that's truly sad.  Wanted and needing to move is something that is seriously on my to-do list.  Having this baby has really put many things in perspective.  Also, like I stated earlier, so much time, energy, and money wasted on worldly items.  Where did it get me, not where I thought I would or should be.  

Another thing, not graduating with a Phd has done something to me.  All of this student loan debt and to not have a degree, what a waste of time, energy, and other peoples money.  Now, what do I do?  Suck it up and make a change, where change is due.  

Today, I will write a letter to the credit agencies where these default student loans are and see about making a payment arrangement to bring these debts current and put them in good standing.  It seems I'm always robbing Peter to pay Paul, but I'm here and I'm making it, is all that matters.  

Not going to worry about past decisions, or mistakes.  All I can do is stay current and make it better.  Swimming in debt will not be my future.  Things will get better and I'm determined to do it.  

2010 What will it have in Store?

Making Money

One thing that I can truly say is I know I make money. It is evident I see it. As a matter of fact, I have it in case of emergency. What is funny about that is, I couldn't get to it if after 6 and it may be closed due to the holidays, at least it's there. I have had to pay my own mortgages. All three tenats (that includes my moms) have been late since November. What is really going on? One of my tenants is in jail. I deal with his sister. She had the total for November and December and someone broke in her car while at work. If I am not paid by the middle of January I am filing for an eviction. I know the house is a mess. My other tenant now is a grandmom (twice) has had to make some sacrifices to help her daughter. Things tend to happen at the end of the year.

Seeing What I Make

Looking back over the last year. Again, I know that I have money and where it goes. Yes, I did spend out for the holidays, and it was needed. Yes, I buy things I may not need. I do this because I finally have something to show for something. It feels good to know that I can buy this and not have to worry about overdrawing in my account. Now, what I need to do is pay off the Escalade. Due to Christmas and having to pay my own mortgages, I will have this paid off by January 31, 2010. Liam also needs some brakes. I need to call Firestone and find out exactly what is wrong with Liam.

Writing Leads to Reflexation

Looking back over my books. I write from time to time and over the years, I have always wanted the same things. To own property. I think it is the coolest thing ever. When I think about what it will take for me to get on it, I can't see anything straight through. Ok, let's see: Get with Carrie to find out what needs to be done

They don't erase anything

Find out about those 2 loans that should have been in deferment

Keep credit card below 40 %

Pay down MEA

Save money

Pay off Escalade

Have to put 10% down purchasing price

All over the Place, This is Me

I know this is jumping all over the place, stay with me please. Today, I will take my passport photo. This is something that I have been putting off for the past year. What am I doing? Who am I doing it for? Why am I even here? There is a vast world out there waiting to be discovered. Why not travel, there is nothing else to do. I am not getting any younger. Take the time out to enjoy this world in which we were given the opportunity to dwell. For me, 2010 is going to be about awakening, realization, focus, happiness, peace, enjoyment, and overall life. My place is this world, I may not know, but I am going to enjoy every minute that I am here.

New Job How would that Work?

Changing jobs would be wonderful and what is sad is I don't think I can do anything else. What is even worse is that I know I am worth so much more. Then at the same time am I lazy? I feel that going through the interview process is so whatever. I don't know. I don't want to be the classroom teacher forever and I will not. Taking my last class that I haven't participated in in a few days. Need to be doing something toward my Breadth Component. Thinking of my finances tell me that the Escalade will not be paid off until January 2010, I complete year, wow! Lists work for me.

Escalade January 2010

Saved money 1,000

February 3,000

Pay off Wachovia 2255.57

1,000 left over

March-May 6,000

MEA paid off April

US Dept. of Edu 12,000 Maybe I need to call to inquire about length of time of loan

Purchase house with D

Duplexs/ and more

Scattered Get it Together

This is what is going on with me right now. I am all over the place and need to get it together. This tends to be the story of my life. Slow down, mentally and just all over. I love the person that I am and know I can be so much better. I am not the best that I can be. At least I know that and knowing is half the battle. So today, I start anew. Eating right, focusing and what is important and not the spam, doing right by me. I will also post on my other blogs that I haven't said anything in a long time on. So I will deem this day, a day of renewal. It feel good.

Under Pressure

I will not pressure myself, but the time is not slowing down and in order to achieve my goals I my do what is right. Look toward how I can attain multi unit properties, travel, teach, and live my life comfortably. I am somebody that is worthy of having what I want. Seeing myself with what I want, just block out the spam.