Close, but No Horseshoes

One of my credit reports went down, but the other one stayed the same.  I'm under 600 again, but the other is still 611.  On a lighter note, I have paid off two things on my credit report.  Credit Karma is free and it really has helped me see what my credit scores are and how I can make them better.  Everything is in one place, it provides contact information and that is truly helpful.  

I feel like a pessimist, the glass is half empty.  There seems to always be something.  One thing after another.

-house painted
-grass cut
-flooring (hallway, front room, and kitchen)
-counter top
-fascia board -trees surrounding my home

The story of a property owner.  To be tied up with all of this and little money coming in.  There always seems to be something.  More money going out then coming in.  I'm always into something, never doing the right thing.  Now, I have someone else to be concerned with, this little boy that I have to make sure has diapers, is fed, clothed, housed, and taken care of.

Did I mention I have two vehicles, both under the weather.  It's always something in my life.  I guess that's what liven does to you.  My truck, I don't know what's wrong with it.  The battery will not hold a charge, it's leaking oil and overall running hot.  My car, the seats will not move.  I feel like a faucet with a slow leak.

On top of all of this there are several student loans that constantly call even if I've made my monthly payment.
Marybelle 3500
Student loans 160,000
House 54,000

I have a house that needs to be rented, I'm overall tired.  Tired of doing this alone, I need help, someone on my side to say hey, you're doing a good job.  Things will be alright.  I once had ambitions and goals, where they have gone, I don't know.  A part of me feels like a failure, the other part tired, tired of all of the bills, debt, issues.  Just tired.

This August I'll be 40 years old.  During the year of 40, I want to move into a better home.  Tired of being in the hood.  This little boy deserves better, I deserve better.  I have been in this house long enough.  The thing is where do I start to find someplace that I would love?  There are a few things that I want for my home.  There are new homes all throughout Columbus, GA, but they aren't what I want for myself.  I want so much more, but how can I want more when I'm not happy with what I have?  That's a good question.

I've been writing this and have accumulated more and more debt.  The title of this blog is financial success, but I don't have any.

I'll continue to pay off the debt that I have and work on making my credit score better.  By this time next year I'll have things in order where we can move into a better neighborhood.  This is my life, the decisions that I have made have led me to this person that I am today.  No I'm not happy with them, but I'm here and I am glad to be here.  Still learning daily and all I can do is better.

Goals
Get house in order
Pay off Marybelle
Move to a better house/neighborhood
Higher credit score
Cars fixed